Heart Centered Tantra
Trust
Ground
LOVE
Ascend
The red rose whispers of passion, And the white rose breathes of love; O the red rose is a falcon, And the white rose is a dove. But I send you a cream-white rosebud with a flush on its petal tips; For the love that is purest and sweetest. Has a kiss of desire on the lips.
-A White Rose by John Boyle O’Reilly
In a sacred union, the purpose of the divine feminine is to help the divine masculine rise into the heavenly realms of bliss, while seeking for herself to ground down into the protective, nourishing Earth energy of the masculine. If a man is not secure in who he is, if his lower chakras are imbalanced, then he is not rooted, and therefore the woman has nothing to ground her into that union. When the masculine energy is not rooted, because of financial stress, conditioned fears around performance and body image, the toxic aspects of his masculinity will manifest in that partnership. His fears and insecurities will create doubt, fear, hesitation, and insecurities in the feminine as well. If there is a lack of trust, security, and grounding in a relationship, a couple cannot thrive and reach their full potential as divine lovers. This is why trauma and intimacy coaching, healing from sexual trauma and conditioning, and chakra work is so beneficial for both couples and those seeking to be in a divine union.
As women, we expect men to be the pillar of strength for us, but sometimes the masculine has been so wounded, the feminine must be strong enough to help him heal first, and be strong enough to say to him, “Before you can be that place for me, I must be that place for you.” A man must heal in order to truly feel the full spectrum of his emotions in a healthy way. It is not the job of the feminine to fix the masculine. She simply gives him a safe working environment and the tools to fix himself. It is not the job of the masculine to fix the feminine. He simply allows her the space to be in her feminine flow and holds her through her emotions. It is in the holding of her through her emotions that he also learns to hold space for himself and his own emotions without his own self judgement.
True love and intimacy require that both people be brave enough to surrender the parts of themselves they have been hiding away for most of their lives.~
Tantric Techniques
Fire Breathing
An exercise that can be done solo or with a partner for moving sexual energy up through your body, opening all of your chakras. It can be used as a prequel to lovemaking, during lovemaking or simply to awaken one's own sexual energy. It can potentially awaken Kundalini energy in some people before they are ready. Years ago, before I started healing my physical layer, I suffered from Kundalini awakening induced back pain that lasted a week because of the immense amount of energy running through my body. Proceed with caution if you’re not in good health and especially if there are previous spinal traumas or disc issues.
Vocal Toning
Utilizes the power of sound to bring each chakra to full functionality, resonating and aligning these energy centers for health and higher consciousness. The chakras are the seven key energy centers of the body that affect various aspects of overall health. Vocal toning pairs the right vibration with the proper healing intentions. Sound has the power to heal. Just think about all the times that you have experienced heartbreak and sang your heart out to the right music at the right time and how it helped heal you.
Eye Gazing
An ancient Tantric spiritual practice used to deepen intimacy between a couple. The eyes truly are the windows to the soul. As a society, we rarely even look up from our phones much less take the time to look deeply into someone's eyes. When couples look deeply into each other, while seemingly awkward at first, this creates a level of comfort not achieved through simple conversation. In the other, we see their soul. We see ourselves reflected back to us.
Play Laugh Enjoy
Laughter may actually lead to an easier orgasm for women. Many women even have bouts of laughter brought on by having an orgasm in the same way some are moved to tears. This is why I say that sex is more emotional and spiritual than physical. It’s easier for most people to connect physically than emotionally, but sexual intimacy alone keeps us stuck in body consciousness and limiting mental programs. Emotional intimacy connects us to a partner at the heart and the soul, which allows us to move beyond just the pleasure of the body. It increases the pleasure of the body because it moves us away from the fears of the mind and just allows us to feel what is in our heart, soul, and body.
Nuru massage is a Japanese erotic massage technique that utilizes a special odorless and tasteless seaweed lotion called Nuru gel. One partner massages the other’s body with their own body. If you’re planning to have sex afterwards, this can be done nude, but my suggestion is to plan to skip the intercourse, leave the underwear on, and just enjoy the sensation and the tease. Remember those days back in your teens when you were too scared to go all the way on a date because of pregnancy, but you did everything else you could get away with? You groped and grabbed, rubbed against each other, and kissed for what seemed like forever. Be nostalgic and get back to that playful time before intimacy was destination oriented. Let go of the need for every sexual encounter to lead to intercourse and orgasm. Be in the moment with your partner. Connect at the heart and soul first, then get acquainted with each other’s body little by little.
Physical intimacy doesn’t always have to start or even end with sexual intercourse. It can be something as simple as holding each other, kissing, resting in each other’s arms, or a man resting his head on a woman’s womb. The simple act of holding and being held is profoundly intimate, in some ways more so than sex. It’s only once we’re truly comfortable with someone that we feel safe enough to simply be and rest. This is also when we’re comfortable with silence in that space of surrender.
